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#identity

24 posts21 participants6 posts today

I Am Violet is on YouTube!

I’ve reactivated my YouTube channel! For a little while, I had a playlist called How to Be Happy, but I stopped adding new videos to it around January. The two main reasons for my hiatus were an interruption in employment and a certain event outside Canada that gave trans people many reasons not to be happy.

I’ve been planning a new direction for my channel for some time now, and tonight I finally launched my first new video. My channel is going to be a “Trans 101” information source. There are already a lot of sources of information available online, but my contribution will be a series of brief, simple videos explaining the biology, psychology, and history of being transgender.

Please like, subscribe, and share this video. Even if you’re not trans or gender diverse, you may gain unexpected insights into your own personality.

And please ask questions in the comments. That’s why I’m here!

https://youtu.be/K4T6w-oa6sc

Twenty Five and Life

me@workstation:~/$ whois phaysis.comDomain Name: PHAYSIS.COMCreation Date: 2000-04-14T14:49:59Z

Always amazed at my tenacity to keep this domain name, now for 25 years. At a quarter century, and almost half my life, it’s become part of my identity. May as well get the logo tattooed on my arm.

I’m certain that if I ever let this domain go, it’ll be snatched up by porn SEO bots within hours. Can’t let them have all the fun.

Thanks for coming around.

Why do we have so many confusing identities and why should I remember them?

To be honest, you don't need to remember them unless they're relevant to you or those in your life. The only real reason to remember large quantities of them is to help people in their journeys and to help people feel not alone.

Labels, and especially micro-labels, aren't there for you. They're there for us. They're to help us communicate to ourselves that we're not broken, and to communicate to others that we're not just making it up from nowhere (not that you would be any less valid for doing so).

I'm trans because I'm not some broken confused man, I'm a woman, but also because my experience differs from cis women.

I'm gray-sexual, because I'm not defective, it's not some "performance issue". It's genuinely less interest and significantly less need. (Part of the asexual spectrum, it means significantly less sexual attraction or significantly less intense attraction, but not none. Not to be confused with libido which is the need for sexual release.)

I'm polyamorous, because I'm not non-committal or "want permission to cheat", but because I see relationships as ours to define, be it with a single partner or many. I can commit to one and I can commit to many, it's all about the agreements I have with the people I'm in relationships with.